Chapter 4- Bob Dylan, The Who and a Hard Day's Night

The girls quickly got onto their hover scooters, which had been a gift from Puff Daddy…or P.Diddy, or was it just Diddy? Who knows. Anyways the girls quickly hovered across the globe searching for Evan. After mistaking 10 people with hair like Evan’s and one very irritable Cousin It, TGS finally found Evan in his back room watching ghost busters one and two, drinking apple juice after apple juice straight from the jug, his hair a mess and dark circles under his eyes.
“Evan, what happened to you over the summer?” Heather asked sounding worried.
“My parents went away. They didn’t pay the electricity bill, the cable bill, the phone bill, thus I’ve had no contact with the outside world for over a week. All I’ve got left is this battery powered laptop…it’s my last hope” As the screen of the laptop switched off and no longer had any power, Evan let out devastating scream. “Why did you do this to me? Why? I need my Family Guy, my MSN, my Rush and my Team America! I can’t go on living this way! Why oh why did you do this to me” with that Evan dropped to floor and started kicking and screaming in to the carpet.
“We’ve got to get him out of here” suggested Susanne. So TGS, picked Evan up and dragged him to the rehearsal studio and quickly put on a mix CD full of Queen, Rush and the Who. Evan stopped screaming, and began crying tears of joy. Finally they had their Cow Beller.
“Okay ladies, this is what we need to do-“ started Evan.
“Shut up, crazy” Alison quickly snapped back.
“Ali, don’t say that. Evan just a had a severe traumatic mental breakdown. We have to be very gentle with him” explained Emily.
“No, I agree. Evan can’t come and tell us what to do…that’s not the way it works.” Nodded Heather.
“No…if Evan has a suggestion, then lets here it.” Stated Susanne.
The girls quickly began to argue back and forth. Heather flung guitars a peoples heads, Susanne tried to use a symbol as a Frisbee, Emily was smacking Ali over the head with a microphone and a spatuala, saying repeatedly “You-don’t-melt-chocolate-without-water!”
“GIRLS! GIRLS! Your acting like a bunch of lunatics” yelled Evan. With that he hit the cowbell as hard as he could. The girls stopped fighting.
“I think we should go on hiatus.” Said Emily.
“We haven’t even put out our first record yet!” argued Susanne.
“Yeah the record company is expecting it to be in stores by Thursday” agreed Ali.
“But we can’t work like this. We’re trying to rip eachothers heads off, we just need a mini vacation”

So Teen Girl Squad took their mini vacation, separately though. Emily visited Matt Teason from Relient K. She enjoyed their frequent picnics in the park and guitar tuning sessions. She also enjoyed going on tour with them through out the Atlantic Seaboard.

Susanne headed off to London, England. Where she visited the various places of that classic Beatles film ‘A Hard Day’s Night’. While in the train, that the Beatles were sitting on within the first half hour of the movie, she met Ringo Starr. They discussed random issues such as peanut butter, drums and old sci-fi movies. Finally they came down to business.
“So do you really think you and I could make a sci-fi movie together?” she aksed.
“Oh most definetly. I think it would be bloody good too. With all the sci-fi stuff and stuff. It could star a little alien in the form of an M&M, named Zonger, and he would save the world with his sweetness” began Ringo.
“Hmmm…maybe we could try something a little different than that. I mean it sounds great, but maybe we should take a different approach.” Insisted Susanne.
Thus Susanne and Ringo began writing their new yet classic sci-fi movie.

Meanwhile Alison went to New York City, in hopes of finding some starving bassist who she could give lessons to, so she could make some extra cash while on vacation. While she was walking quickly down one street, she accidentally bumped into Bob Dylan.
“Oh my god. I am so sorry, Mr. Bob Dylan…sir”
“I ain’t lookin’ to block you up”
“Um thank you. Actually I kind of wanted to talk to you. You see I’m having problems with this band that I am in, See we’ve just gone on hiatus and we haven’t even put out a record yet. What should I do?”
“I ain't lookin' to fight with you, frighten you or tighten you, drag you down or drain you down, chain you down or bring you down.”
“Well thank you. I’ll try to use that advice.”
“Well, the lone ranger and tonto, they are ridin’ down the line. Fixin’ ev’rybody’s troubles, ev’rybody’s but mine. Somebody musta tol’ ‘em that I was doin’ fine.”
“Hey man if you don’t want to give me advice that’s fine. I’ll just go ask someone else. Maybe Lance Bass from N’Sync is free to give advice…”
“You need the time and stay behind and since my feet are now fast and point away from the past, I’ll bid farewell and be down the line.” With that Bob Dylan was off and began walking down the street humming to himself.
“Well thanks for the advice….I think?”

Heather had an interesting mini break as well. Although she spent most of her time searching for the first Jimmy Eat World CD, but eventually she realized that she was famous and called up Jimmy Eat World instead. They decided to send her an entire CD collection, all autographed, three guitars, and three more guitars just for Heather to smash. They also gave her a bass, a drum kit, and keyboards, which gave her the perfect chance to test her throwing abilities. Heather threw all three instruments off of the ninth story hotel where she was staying, on the ninth floor. Luckily only 7 spiders, one snake and 100000 ants were harmed. None died though. The snake didn’t look like it was going to make it, but after a very insane veterinarian gave it mouth to mouth, the snake was able to pull through.

Eventually girls let out their anxieties, worries and thoughts and made their way back to the rehearsal stage where Evan was impatiently tapping his foot.
“You are so lucky that I found something to do while you were away” he said sounding a little agitated. He pulled out a notebook from his back pack full of numbers. “That’s right. I was able to solve your silly math problem Emily. Muhaha”
“That’s great Evan. But you do realize that we’ve been gone for two months. So it actually took you two months to solve that problem.”
“Awww man!” sighed Evan.
“Oh well…lets get playing!” shouted Heather enthusiastically.
As they began to play their ever so popular song, the doors of the stage flew open. Four shadowy figures appeared at the door. They slowly began to walk towards TGS+Evan. Just then a song began to play in the back ground…
“What the….” Started Susanne.
“Don’t you mean…who the?” asked a mysterious man.
“It’s the Who!” yelled Evan.
“The Who?” asked Alison.
“Yes, the Who.” Said Emily.
“Really, the Who?” asked Heather.
“Hoo, Hoo” hooted an owl outside one of the windows.
“Yes, we are the Who. Well I’m Pete Townsend.”
“And we’ve got a bone to pick with you” said Roger Daultry sounding offended beyond belief.
“What have we done this time?” asked Alison sounding slightly bored, seeing as every time they turned a corner, TGS was bound to offend someone.
“Well you see….”

And The Who began telling their radical story of how being offended really hurt their feelings, and they spent nights crying over it and for some reason Pinball Wizard just wasn’t taking their pain away. They most importantly discussed why they were offended. But like most good stories, I shall use a device called a cliff hanger in order to leave you in suspense. Well then until next time, this is TEEN GIRL SQUAD saying:
“If you spray stains on your t-shirt with vinegar, they are sure to come out. Plus if you put enough vinegar on the t-shirt, you could probably dip your French fries in the t-shirt too. Thus you are killing two birds with one stone but I wouldn’t kill a bird, unless it was trying to eat me, even then I would very hesitant. That is such a violent saying as well. Who thought of that anyways? The bird killing man? Ugh…that’s just so horrible….I don’t think that it’s videogames that are making children more violent, I think its these classic sayings. Yeesh….” (I think it is in your best interest to walk away from the computer screen now)