Chapter 7 By Emily
The TGS and the BFR, making a surprise cameo, were surrounded by angry old people. They were finally at a loss.... There did not seem to be a way out, it was time for "Group Huddle!!" yelled Heather. So while the old people were slowly advancing towards them the Teen Girl Squad started their huddle. Susanne brought tea.
"OK, what do we do???" Asked Emily, who was getting a bit panicky about all of the old people surrounding them.
"Well we could stay and fight"
"But there are over 100 of them"
"Do you like milk in your tea"
"I guess we could try to make a run for it..."
"Wait...They are doing something" Ali pointed towards the wall of old people that was still making it’s slow advancement towards the girls and the BFR. Four of the antagonists were breaking away from the line and hobbling towards the Teen Girls.
It was The Old Pensioner Squad!!!!!!
The Old Pensioner Squad consisted of two old men and two old women. The two squads met in the middle.
The OPS had hundreds of antagonists standing behind them cheering in loud intimidating wails. The TGS had the Big Furry Russian who was in the act of grooming his beard, so he was not much help.
Suddenly a loud bell rang and the Teen Girls and the Old Pensioners rushed forwards to start the showdowns.
Ali and one of the old men were fighting. It was going pretty good for Ali and she had him in a good arm lock when suddenly the arm she was holding detached from his body. IT WAS AN ARTIFICIAL LIMB!!!! This threw Ali off guard so the man had time to reach down, pull off his artificial leg and start to beat her with it. It ended with Ali on the ground defeated and the old man receiving loud cheers from the antagonist side and mumbling about taking some shrapnel in World War One.
Emily was up against one of the old women. They were giving deadly stares to each other for quite a while. Emily was just about to move forward and engage in battle when the woman pulled out a tray of Fresh Baked Chocolate Chip Cookies!! After a brief internal struggle Emily succumbed to the delicate scent that drifted from the cookies and reached to grab one. This was when the old woman smacked Emily with her cane. Emily went down and it was another victory for the olds
Down the line Susanne had rushed forward with a clear goal. She knew where to go and it had never failed her before. She headed straight for the underwear to give her Old Pensioner a good firm wedgie. But something was wrong....the wedgie wasn’t working. She soon realized why. This was one of those old men who have their pants hiked up as far as they can go. This particular old man was reaching impressive heights of just below the armpits. HIS UNDERWEAR WAS ALREADY UP AS FAR AS IT COULD GO AND THE MAN HAD FORMED A SORT OF IMMUNITY TO WEDGIES!!!!!! GAHHHHHHHH! Susanne’s blunder had given the OP the upper hand and he reached forward with a learned hand and pinched poor Susanne’s cheek in a most painful and annoying way. She was left screaming in agony while the OP was greeted with more cheers from his buddies.
Heather faced off against her OP. It was the other old woman. She was one of those really old really fragile ladies who looked like she was about to fall over. Heather was thinking to herself that this would be really really easy when suddenly the frail old woman unleashed her secret powers. COLLAR BONES THAT COULD CUT GLASS!!! The frail old woman was equipt with the razor sharp collar bones as well as ELBOWS AS POINTY AS NEEDLES!!! In a couple of seconds Heather was covered in cuts and scrapes. The Old Pensioner Squad had defeated the Teen Girl Squad!!! Things never looked so bad for the Teen Girls. How could they come back after such a bitter defeat???
Your turn Suzie!
"OK, what do we do???" Asked Emily, who was getting a bit panicky about all of the old people surrounding them.
"Well we could stay and fight"
"But there are over 100 of them"
"Do you like milk in your tea"
"I guess we could try to make a run for it..."
"Wait...They are doing something" Ali pointed towards the wall of old people that was still making it’s slow advancement towards the girls and the BFR. Four of the antagonists were breaking away from the line and hobbling towards the Teen Girls.
It was The Old Pensioner Squad!!!!!!
The Old Pensioner Squad consisted of two old men and two old women. The two squads met in the middle.
The OPS had hundreds of antagonists standing behind them cheering in loud intimidating wails. The TGS had the Big Furry Russian who was in the act of grooming his beard, so he was not much help.
Suddenly a loud bell rang and the Teen Girls and the Old Pensioners rushed forwards to start the showdowns.
Ali and one of the old men were fighting. It was going pretty good for Ali and she had him in a good arm lock when suddenly the arm she was holding detached from his body. IT WAS AN ARTIFICIAL LIMB!!!! This threw Ali off guard so the man had time to reach down, pull off his artificial leg and start to beat her with it. It ended with Ali on the ground defeated and the old man receiving loud cheers from the antagonist side and mumbling about taking some shrapnel in World War One.
Emily was up against one of the old women. They were giving deadly stares to each other for quite a while. Emily was just about to move forward and engage in battle when the woman pulled out a tray of Fresh Baked Chocolate Chip Cookies!! After a brief internal struggle Emily succumbed to the delicate scent that drifted from the cookies and reached to grab one. This was when the old woman smacked Emily with her cane. Emily went down and it was another victory for the olds
Down the line Susanne had rushed forward with a clear goal. She knew where to go and it had never failed her before. She headed straight for the underwear to give her Old Pensioner a good firm wedgie. But something was wrong....the wedgie wasn’t working. She soon realized why. This was one of those old men who have their pants hiked up as far as they can go. This particular old man was reaching impressive heights of just below the armpits. HIS UNDERWEAR WAS ALREADY UP AS FAR AS IT COULD GO AND THE MAN HAD FORMED A SORT OF IMMUNITY TO WEDGIES!!!!!! GAHHHHHHHH! Susanne’s blunder had given the OP the upper hand and he reached forward with a learned hand and pinched poor Susanne’s cheek in a most painful and annoying way. She was left screaming in agony while the OP was greeted with more cheers from his buddies.
Heather faced off against her OP. It was the other old woman. She was one of those really old really fragile ladies who looked like she was about to fall over. Heather was thinking to herself that this would be really really easy when suddenly the frail old woman unleashed her secret powers. COLLAR BONES THAT COULD CUT GLASS!!! The frail old woman was equipt with the razor sharp collar bones as well as ELBOWS AS POINTY AS NEEDLES!!! In a couple of seconds Heather was covered in cuts and scrapes. The Old Pensioner Squad had defeated the Teen Girl Squad!!! Things never looked so bad for the Teen Girls. How could they come back after such a bitter defeat???
Your turn Suzie!
posted by So & So at 4:06 PM
3 Comments:
Nice use of old person clichés.
I must ask though, were you making a point of me being the one to get all of the scrapes to add to my collection of scars?!
I bet Susanne just LOVED that Suzie thing at the end as well.
HULK SMASH!
Just wait until I come up with nicknames for you!
...HEATER! and... and...
YLIME!
No more Susanne's name related jokes!
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