Chapter 13-How many Russians are too many?

By Emily

Well, it took a while, but the Teen Girl Squad finally had an antagonist, who would create big problems for them resulting in an actual plot. However the Teen Girls were unaware of this fact. They were in the cave interviewing potential Russian mafia vampire octopuses. Thankfully they had been smart enough to use the room with the trap door in the floor. The chute beneath led to a bear cave that was on the other side of the mountain and this is where the last actor went. He was a non-smoking Russian and had eight arms, however he had had to get one amputated, and who wants a seven armed Russian? The girls let the next person auditioning enter the room.
In came the Big Furry Russian!! That was interesting, but would he do for the part? Well, he was Russian and tall. Plus he was purple from permanent frost bite he had obtained from being in Northern Russia all of the time. The teen girls decided that he would be the perfect person for the part. They would just have to attach 6 arms to him. No problem.
They were in the middle of their celebration drink, which was chocolate milk in fancy glasses, when the teen girl squad and the BFR- know from now on as ‘the cast’ in movie lingo-were disturbed by a large crashing sound coming from another room. The cast approached the room with caution and peered in. Inside was what can only be described as a Russian mafia vampire octopus who had gotten into an incident with a hot glue gun. He was having a difficult time getting through the room because he seemed to have little control over his tentacles and they kept on sucking onto things. (Start strong Russian accent) "Uuh, oh dearrr..stupid lamp, oh my..ooooh my, this ees no good, must.."(end strong Russian accent) then he noticed that the cast was watching him. He stopped and looked flustered for a bit, then it appeared that he made up his mind to cross the room to them. He tried, he really did, however his tentacles just kept on attaching to things and the hot glue on him was also attaching to stuff. Finally he gave up his attempt to move and just stood there. The Teen Girls and the BFR were also just standing there looking at him.
The Russian mafia vampire octopus thing noticed the BFR
(Start accent)"Who eees hihm?"(end accent) he asked
Emily, expert Russian communicator, stepped forward "This is the person we selected to play the part of the Russian mafia vampire octopus. I assume that you are here to try out for the part? Yes, well I’m sorry but you are too late."
The man looked very shocked and muttered to himself for a bit. He had a bit of a stutter. Then he pulled out a cell phone and, all the while giving shifty glances at the Teen Girls and the BFR in the doorway, made a call. Frankly the TGS just didn’t know what to do about this sort of behaviour, so they just tried to look like they were not trying to eavesdrop on the call, which they were.
Now the Russian was speaking in an almost frantic voice into the phone (Start accent)"But they are already c-c-choosink someone!!....big and furry and Russian....ya...I don’t know...V-VAT?!? ..."(end accent) he looked up at the girls and asked if there was anyway they could re-consider their decision, they said no, and then after further encouragement from the person on the other end of the phone he asked who the producer of the film was and would it help if he slept with them. Susanne was the producer and no it would not help at all.
In the end they got him to leave however as they walked back into the cave the girls all thought that the voice that they heard faintly shrieking over the other end of that cell phone sounding frighteningly familiar. Wooooooo